Major Life Choices

I've reached a fork in the road in my life, I wish I knew exactly what to do.  I sort of hope that something would fall from the sky, hit me in the head and tell me exactly where to go, what to do and who to turn to along the way for the right answers.  Unfortunately that is not the case, there is no instruction booklet that says "do 'a' and 'b' will be the outcome."  You cannot remotely know what to expect in life.  The past month I have had a series of curve balls thrown at me from left and right field (all at the same time) and I'm not very good with hand-eye coordination.  Seriously I've been hit in the face and upper body region with more baseballs (and all other sports balls) than I care to recall, but I digress.

I am at a point in my life where I am job hunting again.  I have a clean slate and I know that somehow it is a sign to move on, but I don't know if I should straight up look for options in places that are not Ohio or if I should look harder in Ohio.  I have friends who have no problems picking up and moving and I know people who have searched and searched here.  I have an inspiration, someone who has moved regardless of how much it sucks and they have done it twice within the past 12 months, they are chasing their dreams they are making the best of the situation and it just pushes me to be brave.  I wish I could be like that, pick up and go, take a plunge.  I miss my bravery, the girl who had no problem taking on "impossible" challenges from the boys on the playground and who could do a flip on the monkey bars w/o blinking.  Slowly throughout the years I've lost that and I'm not quite sure why.

I'm headstrong, smart and always willing to take on a challenge when posed with an obstacle, but there is something about moving that just freaks me out...the uncertainty, the possibility you'll have to move back home, lonliness?  I don't know what it is but I know I'm not the only one with these fears.  Maybe it's just because I don't know what I want to do...get my master's, pursue a career in an amazing city, change professions (cosmetology has always interested me) but I do love the world of Marketing & Public Relations.

This is how all this thinking makes me feel; goofy & not sure what to caption this pic as.

This writing of course is always very therapeutic to me.  Ever since I can remember I have picked up a journal and a pen when things are troubling me or when I'm excited or in love...oh hell whenever there was something I wanted to keepsake.  I think in due time I'll decide concretely, but for now I'm going to just apply to places in other cities to see if I would even hear back.  Why?  Well because you never know when an opportunity is going to arise and if it does why not take the chance...what do I have to lose?